


Bathtime or: It’s a Birthday Surprise

by LucyInTheSkye



Series: Sirius x Remus [49]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Banter, Come Eating, Come as Lube, Comeplay, Humor, M/M, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Shameless, all the come, brief foodplay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-07
Updated: 2021-02-07
Packaged: 2021-03-12 22:15:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29267844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LucyInTheSkye/pseuds/LucyInTheSkye
Summary: November 1980. Fuck it.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Series: Sirius x Remus [49]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1483745
Comments: 2
Kudos: 33





	Bathtime or: It’s a Birthday Surprise

**Author's Note:**

> This got so niche it possibly reads like a crackfic.

“This cake didn’t turn out great, did it?” Sirius said annoyedly. 

Remus took that as a sign that he could put his fork down. The cake, baked by Sirius the night before, was rubbery and rather flat, although to be fair the butterbeer icing was delicious.

“You’re very good as a rule,” Remus said, “but this time there is maybe something about the texture…”

“ _Very good as a rule?_ ” Sirius repeated. “I’m bloody fantastic as a rule.”

He dropped his fork with a clatter and stood up. He then, for reasons that weren’t quite clear to Remus, began unbuttoning his leather trousers. Remus had been looking forward to doing the honours himself, peeling them off him nice and slow, and he found himself watching wistfully for seconds before it all caught up with him.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m going to fuck the cake.”

“Pardon?”

“I’ve never fucked a cake before, and since it had the audacity to turn out this badly it can’t complain. Should’ve seen it coming.”

Sirius slapped his newly liberated, half-hard prick against the side of the cake. Remus felt his mouth begin to salivate.

“Did you have something else planned?”

“Maybe.” Remus hesitated. It looked lovely pushing against the beige icing. Sirius was placing it on top of the cake now, attempting to make a penis-shaped dent. “That’s rather decorative, well done.”

“Come stand behind me why don’t you, get involved.”

Remus did, he rose so fast his chair almost fell over and he caressed his lover’s hips and waist and stomach and he sniffed his lovely, silky black hair. His eyes closed with enjoyment, like a cat receiving pets, but much like a cat he was quick to discern new movement. He peered over his lover’s shoulder. Sirius’s dick was growing big and pushing into the same spot in the cake. Digging a hole for itself. 

“How does it feel?” he whispered. Sirius’s breathing was deep and measured and Remus stroked his hands underneath his lover’s shirt, palmed the strong warm muscle there.

“Like I’m fucking a cake,” Sirius muttered, then he groaned with pleasure when Remus got to his nipples. “Bloody hell, that’s it, that’s the ticket, fucking pinch them… _Mmm_ …”

Remus watched interestedly, his chin digging into Sirius’s shoulder. Sirius was rubbing his hand hard and fast around himself, hitting the cake and making a mess of his cock. 

“Happy birthday,” Remus whispered in his ear; he could see white oozing into the misshapen hole in the cake. “Are you going to…? Ah.”

Sirius bent down unsteadily and used his clean hand to keep his long hair out of his face. He licked inside the hole as though he was expecting the cake to participate in a French kiss. Remus pressed against his behind and only just refrained himself from pushing his lover’s face into the icing. He _did_ have something else planned, as a matter of fact. He thought Sirius might be in just the right mood for it, too. 

“I did have this idea…”

Sirius straightened up and flopped down on the table. He was looking rather content and licking his lips, then he began licking his fingers. Sucking on one, two…

Remus watched and blushed, it looked a lot like… But then, it wasn’t Remus’s birthday, was it, and maybe he should… Later, they could do what he had planned later, if at all…

Remus got down on his knees and kissed his lover between his legs. He’d gone soft fast and his dick was delightfully small and chubby now. Completely covered in icing and crumbs.

Remus licked and kissed, falling into the same rhythm as Sirius, who never stopped fellating his own fingers. He was squirming with oversensitivity, too, but Remus trusted that he would be pushed away if it got to be too much. In fact, Remus was not normally into giving head, but the power he had over his lover right then certainly helped drown out those feelings. It helped that Sirius tasted mostly of butterbeer frosting as well. It was rather fun to mouth at something so soft and plush and innocent-looking. No pubes today, either.

“All clean,” he said eventually, raising his head and blushing furiously when he saw Sirius smirking at him from above.

“I loved that, thank you babe.” Sirius waved his clean hand at Remus.

“I had this idea,” Remus began again, resting his palms on his knees, his mind centring on that feeling he had had, that delicious feeling of… Control. “Because of how much you like – uh. Semen.”

“You’re going to dress up as a sweet little seaman for me? Do a special birthday striptease and hang your sailor’s cap on my dick?”

Remus hung his head, but he laughed, too. 

“Come up here, give us a kiss. I want to hear your plans, I’m sure it’ll be a treat.”

Remus rose, hands finding hips and bodies melding together, all the closeness that could be desired while they kissed and kissed. Sirius was still wearing his shirt and Remus made sure to remove it at the first opportunity, mussed up his lover’s flawless mane of hair, basked in the feeling of standing there clothed with his naked lover squirming in his arms. That he got a little of Sirius’s semen in his mouth couldn’t be helped, certainly, and if they did re-enact what he had planned…

“Have you ever, like, used your wand to make more, uh, you know…”

“This wand?” Sirius suggested and proudly pulled on his flaccid prick, “it makes lots and lots of delicious spunk, Moony. I’ll let you try some if you’re a good boy for me tonight.”

Remus caught his lip and bit down, pulled on it. Sirius’s eyes were endlessly teasing him, and he was throbbing with frustration and humiliation and with those tender, small feelings that fluttered and warmed all inside… 

“I’ve pulled you right into the gutter with me, haven’t I?”

Remus nodded and tried to catch Sirius’s mouth again. Sirius was turning and writhing against him, thrusting…

“I have attempted that as a matter of fact, unfortunately it didn’t work.”

“Oh?” Remus said confusedly.

“If you must know, it made one sperm, I presume it was, swell into this massive, amoeba-like thing. This was back in Hogwarts. I think I tried to fuck it, placed it on the toilet cistern and had a feel, tried to look for a good-sized hole, you know, but it was a bit too weird even for me. Had to Vanish it in the end. Could have animated it to move on its own, I suppose, maybe taught it a few words, set it upon some unsuspecting third-year - it’s always third-years, isn’t it? – but, yeah, I decided to Vanish my great creation instead.”

“Oh,” Remus said again, “that’s funny, considering that when I… Wait, what spell did you use?”

Sirius stared intently at him while he sneaked a hand into Remus’s trousers.

“Dunno. It’s ages ago. Probably your bog-standard quantity increaser.”

“Hmm,” Remus said, his hips with a mind of their own and his erection as large and thick as it had ever been, “it’s funny because I tried it last week with a refilling charm.”

Sirius frowned as he considered it, his hand rubbing soothing circles over Remus.

“I was lonely,” Remus said quickly, some foreign, dark thoughts overpowering him, “I don’t usually masturbate, but you went with James to that godforsaken quidditch game that lasted eighteen hours and I tried to go to bed and I couldn’t… The pillows and the sheets all smell of you.”

Sirius smiled first, then frowned.

“I like the thought of you wanking off. Shouldn’t matter what I think, though. It’s your body, your very own plaything.”

“I know that,” Remus said sharply, reigning it all back in. He knew this. He had this. “Well I – I got off in the tub and then I figured I might see what happens if I… Because you seem to like…”

“And it worked? Why the fuck are we dithering around here for, then?”

Sirius was grinning manically and pulling on Remus’s hand, dragging him towards the bathroom. Remus stumbled after him, his walk impeded by the buoyant, overheating thing between his legs.

“Off!” Sirius said imperiously, pulling and almost tearing, watching as Remus tripped out of his clothes. Remus got his wand from his pocket before his trousers fell around his ankles and he stood there naked and shivering and armed and feeling some of his old shyness looking to enter the arena with them. 

Sirius’s impatience melted away, and Remus wasn’t too far gone to notice how quick the shift was. They kissed for a good long time, slow and deep and rather loud. Remus felt Sirius’s hand on his hand, squeezing down over his wand. The room turned several degrees warmer. Remus could feel it when the bad things left him, effortlessly scrubbed off and leaving behind only relaxed shoulders and a mounting excitement and that heat that was focused between his legs. Sirius’s hand was there too, weighing his length in his hand, then his balls although they were drawing up, readying themselves –

“Got to get it in the bathtub…”

“Yeah.”

Sirius had to catch him again, around the middle this time, because he had forgotten that his feet were still stuck in his trousers. Together it became part of the plan, though, with Sirius moving him forward like it was a cross-body lead and like he could hear music. Remus ended up facing the tub with his lover plastered against his skin, holding him, stroking him, aiming for him. Remus lasted seconds under these ministrations, then ropes of white flew through the air and splattered into patterns across the porcelain. Sirius’s breathing was just as ragged as his own and he didn’t seem to want to relinquish Remus’s dick.

“Right, I’ve got to… Let me just…”

Remus caught his breath and some of his concentration, snatched it back from the claws of deepest satisfaction and burgeoning overstimulation. Surprisingly enough he had kept the grip on his wand throughout their little dance and tumble. Focusing hard on the sickly gleaming streaks below he muttered out the correct incantation. It was lucky he had just gotten rid of so much emotion, he would have lost focus quickly otherwise. Now he just kept his line of magic going and going until he realized the floor of the tub was long since covered, in fact it looked close to ankle deep… 

“Umm,” Remus said, extending his arm until he could place his wand on the edge of the sink and out of the way. The bath ducks, the red one with devil horns and the bright yellow one, were both staring at him, judging him… He took them and tossed them into the bath, blushed when he heard the splatter they made. Sirius was holding him with uncommon force and kissing his neck noisily, and goodness were those teeth scraping, the rarest of delights in Remus’s world… “Why don’t you step in?”

He held Sirius’s hand and placed his other one on his lower back, taking perverse pride in guiding his lover into the bathtub, the bathtub that was awash with semen. Remus’s semen, which was of course the all-important detail as far as he was concerned. The ducks glared at him, drenched in dirty, sticky white stuff.

“Let’s get you – mmm.”

Sirius began sinking to his knees before Remus could guide him, his shins and knees disappearing and come washing up his thighs. Remus groaned out loud before he could stop himself, listened to it echo off the tiles and stared at his lover’s penis, pretty and pink and moving up to the side, all the way up to his stomach, hovering in the air in front of him and above the sea of Remus’s sperm. 

Sirius grabbed a duck in each hand and acted out a race between them, complete with sound-effects. Remus felt as though he had swallowed his own tongue, but his eyes were eating up the scene.

“If you want to play you might have to get in yourself, too.”

The tease was back in Sirius's voice and Remus groaned again. He decided to sacrifice his feet, getting in in front of Sirius and sitting down on the edge of the tub. His come reached all the way past his ankles and he resolutely ignored the gross, rather intriguing way it felt between his toes. It felt colder than the air around them, and Remus thought it was lucky that Sirius had thought to adjust the temperature in the bathroom upwards. 

Sirius let go of the ducks, shuffled forwards and kissed him, put his sticky hands on Remus’s knees. Remus’s hands went on a wander, taking in the plushness of his lover’s skin, the silk of his hair. Clean and dry and perfect. Then he paused his kissing to focus, dipped fingers into the mess he had made, and his breath caught at the sight. His hands looked scandalous emerging dripping wet and slimy, even more scandalous when he caressed Sirius’s upper thighs and left shiny opaque tracks behind. 

Sirius was not to be outdone at his own favourite game and before Remus got to his plump, pretty cock he had stuck his hands into the liquid too and caught some in cupped hands that he raised. He kept eye contact with Remus as he lapped it up, provocative, gleeful eyes of breath-taking beauty, long red tongue Remus knew better than the back of his own hand dipping in almost demurely before retreating, over and over again. It dripped down his chin and made him look as though someone had just come in his mouth. It was one of Remus’s favourite sights in the whole world.

When his hands were clean again Remus took his turn and got a palmful of come that he lifted to Sirius’s balls. He was ever so careful with them, just let them rest in his palm. Bathed them with a slow, massaging hand movement. Sirius was breathing deeply and his neck was bent to watch. His hips were forcefully still. There was a slow drip of liquid trickling back down and hitting the surface.

“And your cock,” Remus said gently, like he wasn’t saying the dirtiest thing he could have possibly said. He kissed Sirius’s cheek while he got plenty more in his hand, breathing in he could smell it, coming from Sirius’s mouth and from down by their feet. They both looked on avidly and Sirius made a very contented noise. Remus took his whole penis in hand, so warm and throbbing it must have felt soothing to get something cool on it. “All over,” Remus mumbled, petting the shaft and rubbing his thumb over the head, then pulling down the foreskin and slicking him up again, carefully and meticulously. There was plenty more, though, so he let go and scooped up some more, lathered it all over his prick again. And again.

“You shouldn’t have made me come before,” Sirius said, “I’m about to come again and after that I’ll be so fucking spent, Moony…”

“I’ll keep coming for both of us,” Remus said, trying not to sound callous, although yes, that little part that liked having the upper hand was purring with delight, unhampered by something so human as refractory periods, “how deep is it? Can you – ah.”

Sirius splayed his legs, still on his knees, and his body sank down until his genitals became all but submerged.

“That’s very nice,” Remus whispered, and he was moving his foot until it was between his lover’s legs, until his lover could take him around the ankle and press him close, “you can get off just like that and then I’ll help you with… You’ll be wanting this all over, won’t you?”

Sirius was already moving his hips sensuously, his cock sliding against the sole of Remus’s foot. He nodded agitatedly, but after that it was still a graceful head that bowed between his legs, that extended a kiss to Remus’s penis. The lips were so, so soft. 

“And you can do that while we both get on with it,” Remus said with an approving nod that quickly turned into him throwing his head back and keening. His boyfriend’s mouth was teasing him, kissing him but then sucking on his foreskin like he was trying to pull it over his glans, like he was trying to suck it straight off. Tonguing at the opening and licking underneath, tongue and dickhead pressed together underneath his foreskin. All the while Remus could feel the sweet tickling and rhythmic bumps on the sole of his foot, Remus’s own come billowing around his feet, moved because Sirius was in constant movement, using him to rub up against, pints of semen slicking the way, so very ready to add more to it, to come for him, for both of them.

Sirius wrapped a hand around the base of him just in time to stop his climax, and his eyes were so gorgeous and playful that Remus didn’t mind.

“Let’s get this all over you…” Remus tried to calm his boiling blood as he bent forward and got his hands wet again, then he rubbed them experimentally over Sirius’s athletic back. “You’ll be wanting more, won’t you...” Remus got more, then rubbed soothing circles with it. He followed the shapes of the muscles, of the bones where they poked through. It looked like he was pouring glue over the most pristine of porcelain sculptures. Remus smeared it over his shoulders and his neck, caressed him good and slow and left opaque off-white goo behind. His skin got so shiny if you took your time to rub it in. They looked deep into each other’s eyes, Sirius sucking and sucking on his tip and Remus tracing his collarbones with come. 

“Shame about your hair,” Remus said solemnly, noting the gleam in Sirius’s eye just before he slapped a handful of semen into the side of Sirius’s head. Sirius sucked hard and then caught the very end of his foreskin between his teeth, his swollen cock all outside of his mouth but still caught and looking utterly ridiculous, like a fleshy, cylindrical balloon balancing between Remus’s groin and Sirius’s mouth. Remus dipped one hand back into the mess around his feet, with the other he rubbed and rubbed, turning finest silk into a matted tangle. More wetness, more and more until it was dripping down all sides of his head, until his hair was soaked in white. Remus stared deeply into his eyes and pretended he was shampooing his hair. Sirius was holding him in a fast grip and tonguing underneath his foreskin again. He would have come ages ago, but he was squeezed too tightly.

“And all down your front,” Remus continued eventually. There was plenty dripping down his chest from his hair, but Remus decided to help it along and slopped some more on him, cupped his hands and poured it out over Sirius’s head and watched it slide down. Remus found his nipples underneath the thick coating and rubbed them between his fingers, worked them until they throbbed for him just like Sirius’s dick did against his foot. Like his own did in Sirius’s mouth. Sirius’s hand around him was relaxing, finally, occupied as he was with his own imminent climax. 

Remus got there first, he thrust down his lover’s throat and held his drenched head to his groin. He came for what felt like minutes, Sirius’s gag-reflex pummelling him where he was at his weakest. He slumped back against the tiles and smiled, but Sirius was still busy with his dick, wasn’t letting it all the way out. And he was moving with less and less finesse and really pressing himself into Remus’s foot.

“Goodness,” Remus said and bent back down. Sirius was coming against the sole of his foot, and Remus recognized it even without his normal grunts and shouts and swears. Sirius coughed his dick up and Remus bent down and kissed him, held his face in his hands and kissed him passionately. The taste was pungent, yet the soft things in his belly whirled and fluttered in such numbers that he didn’t really notice it.

“Good orgasm?” Remus whispered against his mouth, felt the corners of his mouth pull into another grin. “You’ve made my foot all dirty, you know.”

Sirius gripped his left foot, the one he had climaxed against, and pulled it out of the murky depths, shapeless and dripping with white. Remus slouched back against the wall for balance, daring him with his eyes, although he likely would have, anyway.

“Mmm…” Sirius said, then he licked a broad, ticklish stripe from heel to toe.

Remus felt breathless again and his insatiable cock was stirring, growing fatter where it lay across his right thigh. Remus wasn’t proud of his own perverted mind, of how he reacted to the sight of his lover bathing in sperm, especially since this was supposed to be Sirius’s kink and not his. He wasn’t proud, no, but he didn’t feel as awkward watching and participating as he had thought he would. Sirius was looking at him with glittering, untroubled eyes and the tongue lolling out of his mouth was creamy with come.

“Taste nice?” Remus asked quietly as the tongue disappeared.

Sirius nodded, then opened back up and sucked on his big toe. It felt amazing, what with his hot tongue swirling around, then easing into a comfortable suckling.

“Your mouth was made for that, I reckon. You love putting dirty things in there, don’t you?”

Sirius’s eyes turned huge and faux-innocent, his mouth opened as wide as it could and he crammed all five toes inside.

Remus lost his capacity to speak and just sat back and enjoyed. He was achingly hard again by the time his toes were released and he was forced to put his foot back into the tub.

“It’s drying on you, that can’t feel nice. Maybe we should call it a night,” Remus swallowed and ignored the insistent throb in his penis, “it’s time we clean you up, hmm?”

“Don’t I get a birthday fuck?”

Remus blushed deeply and began stammering something out, although he was quickly interrupted. 

“You can’t really leave me with your spunk covering all but one part of my body, can you?”

“That does sound counterintuitive,” Remus agreed, shaking his head to clear it, “ah, you might even say irresponsible. It’s your day, after all, so I should cater to all of your whims, shouldn’t I?”

Sirius smirked at him, then fished out one of the ducks and licked it.

“Tastes so good.”

“You’re depraved,” Remus said, but his voice lacked conviction and contained rather a lot of want. “You’ve had so much already it’s like a second dinner. Lucky the cake was rubbish.”

“Fuck you,” Sirius said and threw the duck, which hit the wall next to Remus’s head with a quack before it splashed back into the bath of semen.

“Or fuck you?” Remus asked, caressing his filthy hair, then his soft bottom lip. “If you’re sure you want…?”

“We’ll give it a try,” Sirius said, mouthing over his thumb, “you should use plenty of lube, though. Like, ridiculous amounts.”

“Lube,” Remus muttered, “right…” He looked longingly at his wand, some feet away on the sink edge. Then he realized Sirius was laughing at him. “Oh yes, of course.”

Remus made his lover turn around so that he couldn’t laugh in his face, pushed his chest down into the pool of come, half of Sirius’s head, too…

“Such a nice backside,” Remus told him sweetly. His lover’s arse was sticking up, beautifully pert and muscular and drenched in semen. Remus petted his balls and his soft cock, hanging limp and creamy between his legs. Sirius grunted; he had gotten up on his elbows but rather a lot of his body was still bathing in the abundance of semen.

Remus used his thumb to rub over his anus, tight and small and shaved like the rest. It was rather gorgeous and Remus felt emotion well up inside him. 

“Lots of lube,” he mumbled, scooping some more come up and patting in between the thick cheeks. One finger probing, circling…

“Always so tight,” Remus told him affectionately. They had all the time in the world today though, no wolf eager to get inside, nothing but Sirius’s kinks and comfort to be considered. He slipped inside and retreated, feeling a thrill move all the way down his spine. He scooped up more semen and massaged it all over his arse. Then he went back, poked the opening in the same way…

Sirius pushed back just a little and Remus blushed when he found his finger a couple of knuckles deep. It was swelteringly hot inside, and the sheerness of the texture pressing around his finger had him closing his eyes and breathing deeply in an attempt to calm himself. The smell around him wanted to overpower him, but he had another want that was stronger now. He used his other hand to get more come, to rub it into his behind and all around the finger that was penetrating him. Tried to get more fluid in with the finger. It was a mesmerizing task and Remus lost minutes to it, just staring at the tight hole churning around his finger, slowly easing its grip, ever so slowly relaxing enough that he could fuck the finger in and out. Add a second finger, then eventually a third.

“I think we can do it,” Sirius’s voice said, cutting through the haze Remus was in, “feels alright, yeah?”

“You feel amazing,” Remus said, heat creeping back over his cheeks, “yeah, I think it might work now.”

His fingers slipped out and Sirius turned poisedly in the tub and caught Remus’s three fingers with his mouth.

“Dirty,” Remus whispered approvingly. The come on his lover’s face was mostly dry and looked like flaking skin. Sirius daubed a palmful of come onto Remus’s erection while he tongued between two of Remus’s fingers, then with a small ‘pop’ he pulled back.

“I think I want you to get in with me, though. You can sit on me, fuck me into the tub.”

“Ok,” Remus said, his voice sounding hoarse all of a sudden. 

Sirius turned and flopped down into the pool of semen, his legs splayed as much as they could be. Remus crawled over him, blushing but secretly rather exhilarated, his aversion to what was in the tub with them pushed as far back as it would go. The ducks were by Sirius’s head, glaring at them both. His cock was heavy with arousal and dripping wet, but it was of a size that made Remus feel bad when he tried to relocate the hole they were supposed to take. It was so small, catching on his finger, and barely felt as though it had been worked open at all. He pushed a finger inside, then two. Then he took his length and pushed. 

They both groaned and Sirius took the red duck in his fist and squeezed. Remus was panting, pressing, and it wasn’t completely unrelenting, it was giving, but only just. 

“Are you alright?”

Sirius swore, but then he nodded quickly, the red duck quacking affrontedly from between his fingers.

“I think,” Remus whispered, pushing a little further, just a little, and it felt so damned good for him, but… “I think half, hmm? We’ll… We’ll stop here, I won’t go deeper.”

“That’s half?” Sirius said with a shaking laugh, “feels like you’re halfway into my intestines. Yeah, let’s do half. I’ll survive. It’s not like you’ll last long anyway, is it, babe?”

“Absolute gobshite, you are,” Remus muttered, taking his lover’s head and pressing it down and making him splutter. Then he released it and focused back between his cheeks, drew out, then back in. It felt too good and Sirius was right, despite how arrogantly he was laughing, because Remus’s testicles were drawing back up and tightening and there was no way to prolong this, not with that hot, slippery hole tugging at him and squeezing him, tighter and tighter with every move…

Remus almost cried; his orgasm was so good. He touched himself wonderingly, fumbled with the place they were joined, and panted like he had run a whole marathon in approximately thirty seconds. Sirius was still laughing, but it wasn’t a nasty laughter. Once Remus slipped out he also very willingly got back up on his knees and pulled his cheeks apart so that Remus could get his fill of what it looked like. Stark pink but dripping cream continuously, and then when he pushed his finger inside…

“Mmm…” Sirius said and wiggled his bum a little. 

“We need to shower,” Remus said eventually. Sirius pouted at him but he didn’t say anything, so Remus stood up and extended a hand to him. “I like washing you clean,” Remus said gently, “I like it when you’re covered in my smell and I get to clean it up for you.”

Sirius looked rather pleased and took his hand, but then his theatrical side took over and he tossed his head so that his drenched hair whipped through the air and splattered the wall and the floor and Remus’s face. Remus pulled him into the shower in the corner of the room, lukewarm water bursting out the second they got near the taps. Remus cleaned him with water and his bare hands, first, then with soap. Sirius’s whole body was a work of art and Remus’s hands were reverent when they explored, turned him around and caressed the velvety skin. His hair took a while to clean and detangle his time around, but Remus didn’t mind. It felt nice in his hands, too. 

He was formulating a plan while they showered, thinking about what else there was that was new and that they could try. What Sirius might enjoy, despite how he never asked. How he never pushed, which Remus was eternally grateful for, because, well, gross… But also, was it really so gross that he couldn’t, just once, just for his birthday?

“Need to clear you out inside, too,” Remus said, reaching awkwardly outside of the shower for his wand, then pointing it at his lover’s full, athletic behind. Some white sludge poured out, mixed with the water still cascading from above, and Remus shuddered, but he was getting down on his knees even so, steadying himself… 

“I don’t think we can do more to my arsehole tonight, it’s getting sore.”

Sirius looked down at him over his shoulder and Remus cowered, feeling so small and awkward and wondering how Sirius did this when the tables were turned, how it came so naturally to him. What to do and say and how to touch and kiss just right…

“I wasn’t… It’s – ah. I thought I would…”

Sirius stared into his eyes and Remus thought he was reading his mind, piecing together what his eyes told with what little he had managed to say.

“You don’t have to, you know. Even if it is my birthday. Doesn’t mean you have to – I mean, I reckon you’ve already done plenty more than what you’re comfortable with today, yeah?”

Remus almost nodded, but then he didn’t. He hadn’t been nearly as out of his comfort zone in the bath as he thought he would have been, in fact he had enjoyed it almost as much as he knew Sirius had. He leant in instead, parting his lover’s cheeks and kissed him there. Soft and slow, like he wanted to be there. It tasted perfectly clean, even when Remus stuck his tongue out and swiped across it.

“Best birthday ever,” Sirius grunted, he was fumbling for Remus’s hand and Remus gratefully let him have it, let him squeeze it and squeezed him back. Kissed some more while the water poured down over them both, leaving them squeaky clean and carefree once more.


End file.
